Recon is a great place to make some fantastic new friends and acquaintances, enabling you to message, interact, or meet up with each other (be it privately, or at one of our many sponsored events worldwide).
Meeting new people can be great fun, but at the same time we encourage you to do it safely. In order to help to ensure your safety, and prevent identity theft, we suggest that you do not put very personal information on your profile.
Let your instinct guide you and don't continue the discussion if you do not feel comfortable with another member. For a comprehensive list of tips and general safety information, please visit our website www.recon.com and click on the ‘Safety Tips’ link that you will find at the bottom of any of our screens.
Avoiding Sexually Transmitted Infections (STI's)
There are a number of practical steps you can take to reduce the risk of Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs):
- Practice safer-sex to minimise the risk of sexually transmitted infections.
- Use condoms and plenty of water-based lube for anal sex.
- Do not use oil-based lubes with condoms unless they are specifically designed to be used in that situation - many oils will cause latex condoms to weaken.
- Whilst it is commonly viewed that oral sex has a lower risk of transmitting HIV and some other STIs, some people choose to minimise that risk further by using condoms.
- Latex squares called Dental Dams are available for rimming.
- Gloves are recommended for Fisting.
- Insert-able equipment and toys such as sounds, dildos, butt plugs or douches should be thoroughly sterilised following each use and certainly before using on another person. Ideally they should only be used on one person.
- Using a new condom over a dildo or butt plug will help prevent cross infection.
- Floggers, whips, paddles, etc. should be sterilised appropriately, especially if skin has been broken.
Contact your local sexual health clinic for more information on Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) prevention methods.
Minimising Risks in Bondage and Discipline Play
Safer play is about being aware of possible risks and deciding what action to take to minimise them.
Two common acronyms within the BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism) scene are SSC (Safe, Sane and Consensual) and RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink).
Whole books and websites have been written on this, but much is down to your own personal judgement.
Ensure you know your partner's limits. Talk about them in advance, either online or in person. And stick to the agreed limits!
If you are into bondage or any kind of BDSM play, agree a "safe-word" up-front. This is a code word that means "Stop!". It should be something you can remember easily and that won't come up in the normal course of conversation. When you say it, your partner knows it's a signal that something is wrong and that they should immediately stop. Always STOP if your partner asks you to. A common "safeword" system is Red, Amber, Green:
Red = STOP NOW
Amber(Yellow) = Approaching Red
Green = I'm fine!
If playing with gags or any form of headgear, ensure that a safe action (instead of a safe-word) is agreed, as your partner may be unable to talk. Ensure that there is a clear means by which they can signal that they are in difficulty.
If you restrain your partner, check their circulation and breathing regularly. Do not leave a restrained person alone - for any reason - always be in the room with them. Do not place ropes around the throat, or tightly round the chest. There are courses available for those interested in learning about safer Bondage and S&M.
Keep a pair of strong blunt ended scissors (or medical shears) handy, in case you need to get your partner loose quickly. Avoid pointed scissors or knives as you could cause more damage.
Be aware that your play partner needs to breathe, so don't cover the nose and mouth at the same time. Breath control is an extremely dangerous sexual practice. Make sure you know the risks and learn the basics of CPR/resuscitation.
If you or your partner have any specific medical conditions (e.g. epilepsy, allergies), are on any medication, or suffer from any phobias (e.g. claustrophobia), ensure both of you are aware of this, and comfortable to proceed.
Want more advice on specific risks?
There are many resources offering good advice available on the internet or in lifestyle books. You can also talk to people who are into it, most people are happy to help or offer advice where they can.